


higurashi group chat

by EevieP



Category: Higurashi no Naku Koro ni | Higurashi When They Cry
Genre: and "jokes", teen up for most of the language
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-06
Packaged: 2019-08-19 04:00:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16526903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EevieP/pseuds/EevieP
Summary: i got boredKirakira - renanippa you fuck - rikagamer girl - mionshii-chan - shionnico nico ni - satokokill me - keiichikill me too - satoshi





	1. the start of it all

**Author's Note:**

> i got bored
> 
> Kirakira - rena  
> nippa you fuck - rika  
> gamer girl - mion  
> shii-chan - shion  
> nico nico ni - satoko  
> kill me - keiichi  
> kill me too - satoshi

**Kirakira** has added gamer girl and 5 others in this group.

Kirakira: hello!!! Rena got bored and has decided to make a group chat with her friends! Hauu... (^.^)

gamer girl: wait i was looking at the members and satoshi-kun is in?? i'm not mad but why

Kirakira: funny how you say that, mii-chan! Rena was just looking at her following list and noticed that satoshi still had his account but never used it since he left... but she decided to add him anyways!! :3

kill me too: ah fuck i forgot to delete my account

nico nico ni: Nii nii! It's really you! I may not be able to see you in real life, but I'm happy to see you here!

shii-chan: oh my god. it's you wow

kill me: so this was the guy you kept telling me about? is he hot this is really important

nippa you fuck: keiichi don't tell me you're gay... also who told satoko to watch love live

Kirakira: Rena did!!!!! And Nico is her favorite character!

Shii-chan: Rena... you're gonna turn her into a weeaboo

Kirakira: it'll alright shit-chan~

Kirakira: *SHII-CHAN

Kirakira: RENA IS SORRY SHII-CHAN, SHE DIDN'T MEAN THAT!! HER FINGERS SLIPPED!!

Shii-chan: oh ok

nico nico ni: Rika-chan? What does fuck mean?

nippa you fuck: I DIDN'T THINK SHE WOULD ACTUALLY SAY THIS IM SHAKIGN???!!

gamer girl: RIKA CHANGE YOUR NAME NOW, SATOKO IS TOO PURE TO SAY FUCK!!! i mean...

nico nico ni: I-is it a bad word?!

gamer girl: of course not...!

nico nico ni: Ok then! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!! Its so much fun to say, I can see why you had put that in your name, Rika-chan~

 **gamer girl** left

Nippa: ok i'm back

Nippa: wait why did mion left

nico nico ni: Fuck! Thanks for teaching me that Rika~

Nippa: ...

Nippa: rena please kick satoko out of the chat

kill me: no one answered my question

Kirakira: But Rena doesn't want to!

Kirakira: That's just unnecessary...

Nippa: this is for satoko just do it

Kirakira: hau... fine... Rena will do it... :( i'm so sorry Satoko-chan, please forgive Rena later on!!

 **Kirakira** has kicked  **nico nico ni** out of the chat

 **Kirakira** has added  **gamer girl** to the chat

gamer girl: ok thank you

kill me: is satoshi hot this is for R E S E A R C H  PURPOSES!!!!

kill me too: if you're planning to date me i'm not gay

kill me: don't worry once you see me in real life you'll think "oh my god, that guy is so hot and kawaii i want to fuck him SO badly because i'm gay" ;)))

kill me too: mmm

 **kill me too** has left the chat

 **Kirakira** has added  **kill me too** to the chat

kill me too: just because my username is "kill me" doesn't me i'm in love with you or anything got it

kill me: i've only met you for a few minutes but you're so mean omg :(((( i just wnant to have a gay paretner is that so ghard?! im gonan kill myself im so depressed :'(

kill me too: ???

kill me: i'm joking but please date me you won't be disappointed ;)))

kill me too: no

kill me: yes

kill me too: no

kill me: yES

gamer girl: honestly??? i ship you 2 so hard and i want you to kiss each other

Nippa: i'm with mion

Kirakira: Rena is with mion too!!

Shii-chan: .........rip me haha

gamer girl: trust me you're gonna enjoy watching them fuck each other

Nippa: yeah don't you want to see keiichi put his dick in satoshi's ass

gamer girl: mmmmmmmmm yeah i love me some of that yaoi

Shii-chan: ...ok now I'm imagining that and that's so hot tbh, satoshi is better for keiichi than me

gamer girl: see?! sisters like us ALWAYS have similar tastes!!! :D

Kirakira: R-Rena doesn't like explicit things!!!!!

gamer girl: oh sorry rena...

Kirakira: I-it's fine...

kill me: see the girls agree

kill me too: kill me

kill me: isn't that a mood

Nippa: this is so sad alexa paly despacito

kill me: *posts link to the song*

Nippa: YOU ACVUTALYLL DID IT???? KEIICHI I LOVE YOU BUT NOW I LOVE YOU MORE OMG

kill me: ha

kill me too: we're NOT fucking got that

Shii-chan: why isn't satoko-chan back in???

Shii-chan: wait don't add her back in this would be way too much for her to see

 **Kirakira** has added  **Faito dayo~** to the chat

gamer girl: oh no another love live reference RENA WTH

kill me too: hey love live is good

kill me too has sent a picture

kill me too: best girl

Faito dayo~: Eli!!! 

gamer girl: o o o h no

Kirakira has sent a photo

kill me too: rin totally suits you best rena tbh

Kirakira: Rena is glad you think so!!! She thought that Rin relates to her the best~

Faito dayo~: She does!

**gamer girl has changed the group name to weeb chat**

kill me: anyways satoshi let's fuck

kill me too: SEJIGEJSKRBGUIOSBGSUIPHVGIO 4VN 4UWP????!!!>!??!?!?rF;WLEGMKVUI9 W340

gamer girl: did you smash your head on your keyboard or something

Faito dayo~: Huuuh? What does Keiichi mean by that?

 ****gamer girl: DAMN IT KEI-CHAN


	2. idk what to name this chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> satoshi moves back into hinamizawa to visit a certain somebody and things get awkward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there isn't much satoko in this sorry also this is probably a bit too long
> 
> yeah way too long

kill me too: hey keiichi i'm moving to hinamizawa tomorrow k

kill me too: i'm pming you this for a reason

kill me too: packign up mty things as i'm typing this

kill me too: taking my laptop too of course

 

**weeb chat**

5:30 PM

Kirakira: hey why do i see keiichi suddenly running outside and screaming as if he was being stabbed to death

Kirakira: Rena was going to...

Kirakira: go somewhere... and she saw keiichi like this?

Kirakira: Rena wonders if anything happened to him to make him like this!!! :o

gamer girl: well that's keii-chan for you.

Nippa: oh yeah i was just going to the store to get stuff for dinner for me and satoko

Nippa: when i was just about to leave the house i saw him screaming...

Nippa: also where is that "somewhere" you mentioned rena? sounds suspicious

Kirakira: NNNNNOTHIIIING ATTT ALLLLL

Shii-chan: You're gonna break her... -_-

Kirakira: USO DA!!!

Shii-chan: what? no one's lying...

gamer girl: -yo

Nippa: MION DON'T NO

Faito dayo~: Oh so that's where she got the "uso da" from!!!

Nippa: no satoko... please don't say anything

Nippa: Satoko please stay off my computer until i get home

Nippa: don't even lurk just

Nippa: take a nap or something, anything to stay off it alright

Faito dayo~: Rika-chan is so mean to me sometimes but I'll listen to her T^T

Nippa: ily bye <3

Faito dayo~: <3

gamer girl: wait your bringing your laptop with you to.. the ..... store....

Nippa: well just going there is just boring when you don't have anybody to talk to

gamer girl: fair enough

Shii-chan: I could've happily walked you there, if you wanted...

Shii-chan: Next time, maybe?

Nippa: sure shion, thanks ily

gamer girl: what about me i want your gay love too :(

Nippa: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:

gamer girl: :heart:

Shii-chan: :heart:

Kirakira: :heart:

Nippa: i love girls i'm so gay

gamer girl: aren't we all

Shii-chan: i'm bi sorry

Shii-chan: anyways i gotta log off i need to do chores ily all :heart:

gamer girl: OH RITE I ALMOST FORGOT TYSM FOR REMINDING ME SIS

gamer girl: YOU SAVED ME FROM GETTING BEAT TO DEATH

Kirakira: Rena has to log off too! she has important stuff to deal with as well!! :heart:

kill me: guys

**weeb chat**

6 PM

kill me: guys?

kill me: hello

kill me: please

kill me: this is important

kill me: don't leave me HANGING........

Nippa: i only came because my computer kept making annoying notif sounds while i was making dinner with satoko

Nippa: and that hanging joke isn't funny stop making jokes about you killing yourself keiichi

Nippa: ok satoko is getting upset that i haven't come back now

Nippa: i'll ttyl k

kill me: RIKA

Kill me: WIAT PLEAS

kill me: fuck she's gone

kill me: im sorry about that hjoke please come back

kill me: i'm so fuckign bored

 **Nippa** has left  **weeb chat**

kill me: oh fuck me

 

 

5 AM

 

 

kill me too: keiichi meet me outside of the school

kill me too: im sure you know where it is your not dumb

kill me too: i'm worried about that after i typed that there's a huge chance you're dumb

kill me too: aNYWAYS just come here its the weekend, its early morning nobody will see us

kill me too: i'll kill you for real if you don't come here by 6

kill me: im shakin g

kill me: im going tright now

kill me too: great

 

(i'm not going to be bothered with writing that scene out i'm sorry!!! summary: satoshi and keiichi meet, and they have "fun" ;) that's all)

 

**weeb chat**

2 PM

kill me too: hey

kill me: guys

kill me too: guess

kill me: what

Kirakira: whats up???

Kirakira: WAIT

 **Kirakira** has added  **INeverAskedForThis** to  **weeb chat**

Kirakira: sorry rika! ^^;

INeverAskedForThis: ya

kill me: you're saying it to them satoshi

kill me too: no

kill me: F I N E  I ' L L  S A Y  I T

gamer girl: spit it out already

Shii-chan: ahahhaaaaha

kill me: me and satoshi fucked

gamer girl: OH MY GOD YES

INeverAskedForThis: THE SHIPPED HAS SAILED IM CYRIGN

gamer girl: IM FANGIRLIGN SO HARD RIGHT NOW

gamer girl: shii is

gamer girl: cho

gamer girl: king me

gamer girl: now please

gamer girl: help

gamer girl: i'm n

gamer girl: ot jkn

Kirakira: Mii-chan are you ok?!

Kirakira: Shii-chan!!!

Kirakira: Rena knows your readnig this! Stop!

INeverAskedForThis: FUCKFUCKFUCKFFUCKFUCKFUCFK

INeverAskedForThis: NO NOT AGAIN

Kirakira: again??

INeverAskedForThis: SHION STOP YOUR GOING TO CAUSE A LOT OF TROUBLE

Shii-chan: i was choking her until you said trouble

gamer girl: I'M RUNNING AWAY FUCK THIS SSHIIT IM OUT

Shii-chan: What do you mean by trouble

Shii-chan: I'm gonna find her later and kill her then lol

INeverAskedForThis: it'll be very difficult to explain but please listen to me for ONCE

kill me too: keii-chan's dick was very nice ;)))))

kill me: ;;))) ily baby

kill me too: ily too ;)

INeverAskedForThis: i'm happy for you too but not now k

 

 

gamer girl: rika plsv let me hide at your place

INeverAskedForThis: k

INeverAskedForThis: btw bless your soul ilysm you disaster lesbian :heart:

gamer girl: ilysm 2 :heart: going now bby

 

 

**weeb chat**

3 PM

 

 

Shii-chan: I made it seem like I was killing Mion so that she could stay at Rika's place

Shii-chan: I love those useless lesbians so much

Kirakira: ah...

INeverAskedForThis: wtf shion

INeverAskedForThis: also btw you didnt need to do that i'd let anybody come at my place whenever for whatever reason

kill me: "whatever" reason??? ;)

INeverAskedForThis: hey keii-chan i'm taking over rika's laptop for a second

INeverAskedForThis: if you touch my girlfriend i'm gonna fucking kill you i'm not joking

kill me: that's fine

kill me: satoshi's ass is so much better than rika's

kill me: he actually has an ass, rika doesn't have any ass

INeverAskedForThis: this is rika again

INeverAskedForThis: i fucking hate you

kill me: i hate me too

kill me too: ily keiichi

kill me too: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:

kill me: :heart:

INeverAskedForThis: mion again back on topic i'm fuckign happy you 2 finally fucked

kill me: :D

Shii-chan: I'm looking at Mion's history and i saw "hot yuri hentai" just wait til you get home

INeverAskedForThis: Oh shit aaaaaa ha a a ah ha UM....;,.elrvgu9 w458nuvg 9w48hweruvthuirn

INeverAskedForThis: rika's trying to hit me rn doesn't hurt lol sorry bby

INeverAskedForThis: yuri is just as hot as yaoi??? im sorry uh idk i'm a HUGE gay

Shii-chan: actually dont come home im afraid you'll fuck me when u get back

INeverAskedForThis: Thanks for the idea!!!

Shii-chan: I TOLDYOU I;M BI PLEASE

INeverAskedForThis: ;))))

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly idk what the fuck i wrote either


	3. gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mion and rika have a date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is gonna be a little short since i have been waiting for something to download, i'll do a better one either tomorrow or thursday if i'm not feeling lazy i swear

**weeb chat**

Monday, 7 AM

Kirakira: good morning guys <3 how are y'all today?

INeverAskedForThis: good hbu

Kirakira: Just lovely ^w^

kill me: i'm busy in the school library screaming on the top of my lungs

kill me: so yeah i'm good

gamer girl: i'm such a gay lesbian :heart:

INeverAskedForThis: and you're my lesbian :heart:

gamer girl: ily

 

gamer girl > kill me

 

gamer girl: keii-chan help every time i see rika i get slight panic attacks

gamer girl: it's so easy to tell her  i love you on the internet but how do i say it irl without having a panic attack

kill me: you're right fucking next to me in the library and didn't hear me screaming

gamer girl: i have sound proof headphones on right now

kill me: just get off the computer you're on and once you're done follow me

gamer girl: okie

 

**weeb chat**

7:30 AM

 

Kirakira: has anyone seen satoko lately? i know satoshi is still where ever he is right now so nothing should go wrong?

INeverAskedForThis: she asked me if she could stay home from school today, which is quite strange since she never asks me unless there's something seriously wrong

INeverAskedForThis: idk if she is sick??? how do you take care of sick people? where's keiichi when you need him pls

Kirakira: ah

Kirakira: Rena has just seen him taking Mion somewhere, probably best if we don't bother them.

Kirakira: WAIT RIKA RENA CAN SEE YOU RIGHT NOW BRB I'M GONNA HUG YOU AND TAKE YOU HOME

INeverAskedForThis: FUCK THIS SHIT I'M OUT

Shii-chan: Dead meme, Rika...

Shii-chan: wait I forgot she's not gonna respond

killmetoo: shion i'll pm you until school starts so that you won't be bored is that alright

Shii-chan: Tysm

 

gamer girl > INeverAskedForThis

4PM

 

gamer girl: hey um...

gamer girl: wanna go to this new cafe that had opened recently right now?

gamer girl: i'm paying and i'm gonna pick you up

INeverAskedForThis: ok i'll be right there and i'll leave satoko to shion until we get back

INeverAskedForThis: :heart:

gamer girl: :heart: ily bby see you later

 

gamer girl > kill me

 

gamer girl: KEII-CHAN KEII-CHAN OMF G IM SHAKING SO BAFLY WHAT DO I DO SHE'S GONNA BE THERE BEFORE ME AND I'M GONNA HAVE PANIC ATTACKS

kill me: just be yourself you lesbian you'll be fine

gamer girl: THAT AS NT O GELPING BUT OK

 

**weeb chat**

5PM

 

Kirakira: Rena has been looking for Mii-chan, where has she gone? :c

kill me: she's having a date with rika

Kirakira: oh that's great, she's finally dating rika!!!

kill me: wait

kill me: there's a huge age difference between them though

kill me: isn't that illegal...?

Shii-chan: none of this is real so it's ok

kill me: congrats to shion to breaking the fourth wall over here

kill me: let's just have them have fun ok

 

**weeb chat**

Tuesday, 4PM

 

kill me: has the ship sailed?

kill me too: wait what happened

gamer girl: the ship sailed

Kirakira: Rena congrats you on your new relationship!!! :3

kill me: it's official mion and rika are lesbians

kill me too: ABOUT FUCKING TIME

kill me too: when ever i see those 2 having fun im just lyk...

kill me too: "can they just K I S S  A L R E A D Y"

gamer girl: i'll get thrown in jail if we kiss remember

kill me too: fuck

gamer girl: just being with rika is enough for me :heart:

mion's gf: ily 2 ya useless lesbian :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:

gamer girl: wait

rika's gf: ily 2 you're the best gf anyone could ask for :heart: :heart: :heart:

mion's gf: god i'm so fucking gay

kill me: honestly?

kill me: you were gay from day 1

mion's gf: you're right

rika's gf: wait i just realized something

kill me: ?

rika's gf: YOU AND SATOSHI ENVER CHAGNED YOUR NICKN A,MES LIKE ME aND MION

kill me too: OH SHIT

keii-sweetheart's bf: we're all good

satoshi-chan's bf: this the only thing i can think of

keii-sweetheart's bf: k good enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hanyuu is gonna come soon fyi

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT NOVEMBER 5th, 7:00am - i shouldn't have posted this i regret this so much already haha


End file.
